Promise?
by Bishie Hunter Neko
Summary: [Chapter numero uno] Hikari is haunted by a tragic event in her past, and is slowly losing her battle with her guilt, her frustration, and her demons. A person from her past helps her out, but will it be enough?[AU]
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: Ha! I own Digimon, it's right here in my pocket! ^pulls out license^ See?!  
  
^license vaporizes^  
  
Lawyers: ^bwuha^  
  
**IMPORTANT!!!** Just so I don't get any reviews asking me what the hell is going on, I explain right now. In this fanfiction, **none** of the seasons of Digimon have occurred, no one has even encountered a Digimon, nothing!   
  
_Italics are translations, from Japanese to English because I felt like it. _This is talking, and this is thinking'. Enjoy minna-san!  
  
On Add's request, I have edited this chapter so it makes a little more sense. I hope it's a little better. ^_^  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
[Prologue]  


{Hikari's _sensei _and father}  
  
[Father] _No!_  
  
[_Sensei_] _I'm sorry. It's true._  
  
_I don't understand!  
  
__I'm sorry..._  
  


~~~  


{Hikari and her father}  
  
[Hikari] _Are you angry?_  
  
[Father] _Yes! Why wouldn't I be angry?_  
  
_I'm sorry Father..._  
  
_I'm ashamed Hikari._  
  
_I know. Please accept my apology Father, I don't want you to be angry with me.  
  
_

~~~  


{Hikari and her demons}  
_  
_[Demons] _Hikari, what would you like?_  
  
[Hikari]   
  
_What would you like?_  
  
_I don't understand..._  
  
_Strength? Love? Friends? Taichi?  
  
__Stop it! Why are you doing this?!_  
  


~~~  


{Hikari's Parents}  
  
[Father] _We have to escape all, there is too much shame here. Too much sadness.  
  
_[Mother] _Taichi... That was enough, but Hikari...  
  
What's wrong with her? I don't understand it.  
  
We have to go...  
  
  
  
_

~~~  


{Hikari and her parents}  
_  
_[Hikari] _The USA? Why? When? I don't want to go!_  
  
[Father] _You don't have a choice. We are going because of my job._  
  
_But, Father! I can change! I promise!  
  
Don't beg Hikari. It's too late._  
  


~~~  


{Hikari and a friend (Reiko)}  
  
[Reiko] _How's the packing going, Hikari? Are you almost ready to go?  
  
_[Hikari] _Empty... It's all empty...  
  
Oh! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make you cry! Is everything okay?  
  
Yes... Everything's fine, thank you.  
  
_

~~~  


{Random women (mothers)}  
_  
Hikari's such a nice girl.  
  
Very pretty too.  
  
Have you noticed that she's changed? She doesn't seem to be the kind, compassionate girl she used to be.   
  
Could it be because of Taichi?  
  
It could be. Reiko said it seemed like something more than that though, like something was eating her up from the inside.  
  
Did you see her grades at school?  
  
No. Did she show them to you?  
  
Keiko told me about them.  
  
Keiko's such a nice girl.  
  
_

~~~  


{Hikari, her family, and some random US customs person}  
_  
_[Customs random] Can I see your papers please?  
  
[Father] Here they are, sir.  
  
[Hikari] _Mom? Mom!  
  
_[Mother] _Not now please, Hikari.  
  
But, Mom-_  
  
[Customs random] You can apply for your permit here-  
  
[Hikari] _I feel faint... Everything's spinning...  
  
_

~~~  


{Hikari and her new class}  
_  
_[Teacher] Class, I'd like you to meet your new classmate, Hikari Yagami.  
  
[Hikari] H-hello, pleased to meet you.  
  
[whispers]  
  
She's so short!  
  
And waaay too skinny!  
  
What's with her clothes?  
  
[Teacher] I'm sure we'll all make Hikari feel very welcome...  
  


~~~  


{Hikari and her demons}  


  


[Demon] _Did you hear what they said? They're right, you know. You're selfish, weak, stupid. Do you even know what they were saying anyways?  
  
_[Hikari] _The teacher said they would make me feel welcome.  
  
She might, but does she speak for your classmates?  
  
Of course...  
  
  
  
_

~~~  


{Hikari and her mother}  
_  
_[Hikari] _Mom! Please don't make me go back there!  
  
_[Mother] _Why, Hikari?  
  
I don't know what's wrong with me! I can't understand what they're saying! My english teacher asked me why I wasn't in ESL, and-  
  
Calm down Hikari. I'll talk to your father, okay?  
  
_

~~~  


{Hikari and her demons}  
_  
_[Hikari] _Mom understood! I know she did!  
  
_[Demons] How do you know? I don't think she believed you. I think she thought you were better than that.  
  
_Stop it! Stop speaking English! I know you were being mean!  
  
Are you sure?  
  
_

~~~  


[Hikari's mother and father]  
_  
_[Mother] _She's says she doesn't understand what they're saying at school. Something about a ESL program.  
  
_[Father] _Hikari doesn't need to be in some program! She's perfectly capable of understanding English, she just needs to concentrate harder!  
  
I don't know, Nori. The only English she learned in Japan was in junior high school, and I don't think that was much help. Besides, I think something's bothering. Whatever it is, I think it's partly responsible for her grades.  
  
Nonsense! She's just not trying hard enough! If something was bothering her, she'd tell us! She needs to get on with her life and get over Taichi.  
  
_  
  


~~~  


{Hikari's dream}  
  
[Taichi] _Hey Hikari! Watch this!  
  
_[Hikari] _Wow! That's so cool onii-san! This is such a great birthday!!! ...onii-san? Taichi! What's wrong?!  
  
I'm... I'm fine, Hikari, just... Go get Mom, okay?  
  
_{Change in dream scene}_  
_

  


[Taichi]_Hikari... You've got to promise me one thing, okay?  
  
_[Hikari] _Anything Taichi! Oh...god...  
  
Hikari, don't cry, please. I just want you to promise me that you won't let them get to you.  
  
I don't understand! Onii-san, why aren't you making sense?  
  
Hikari, just listen. Even though I won't be there, you just can't let them...  
  
Taichi! Taichi! Answer me! Please...  
  
_

~~~  


{Hikari and her mother}  
_  
_[Hikari] _Taichi! No!  
  
_[Mother] _Hikari, why are you crying? Is something wrong?  
  
I'm okay Mom. It was just... Just a dream.  
  
Are you sure you're okay?  
  
Yes, Mom.  
  
_

~~~  


{Hikari and her demons}_  
_

  


[Demons] _It was your fault, Hikari.  
  
_[Hikari] _  
  
It was your fault that your brother died.  
  
That's a lie! How dare you say things like that!  
  
Come with us, Hikari. We value people who can lie like you.  
  
_

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  


Neko's Note: Hopefully that was better! Please review with your comments and I'll try and post the next chapter as soon as I can! ^_^


	2. Unfamiliar Ceiling

Disclaimage: Poor   


  
[Chapter One]  


Hikari shuffled down the hallway, holding her binder tightly to her chest sot that it wouldn't fall when someone inevitably bumped into her. All around her, a steady stream of students flowed, yammering happily in every language except her own.  
  
Hey, _Hikari_! a voice leered, very close to her ear. She turned around, a mixture of fear and anger burning in her ruby eyes. Grant Ekkel and his gang of equally cruel, stupid friends.  
  
You know what comes next, right _Hikari_? She nodded mutely and waited for it all to begin.  
  
By the time Grant and company were done, Hikari's school supplies were spread all across the hallway. She scrambled around on her hands and knees trying to colect it all. A few faces looked down on her in sympathy, but they all to turned away, too afraid to risk their reputation' by helping.  
  
Here, let me help you. All of a sudden, a tall brunette girl was kneeling down bside Hikari. I just hate it when people do that! Is Grant giving you trouble? Yeah, I thought so. Hikari was shocked. _Who are you?'_  
  
There you go. I'm sorry if I startled you. Here's my phone number, the girl scribbled Mimi' onto a piece of paper along with seven numbers. Call me if you ever need to talk. See you around! As quickly as she had come, Mimi was gone, leaving Hikari standing dumbstruck in the middle of the hallway.  
  


~~~  


Hikari stood silently in the cafeteria line, watching the paper plates loaded with spaghetti covered in tomato sauce. Her stomach churned with hunger- it all looked so good.  
  
_Hikari_, you're actually eating? One of Grant's cronies passed by, landing a c=punch on her arm which made a sickening crunch against the bone. Hikari winced but didn't cry out, trying to direct her attention away from the pain.  
  
Still more plates of spaghetti flowed by, and the line inched forward, bringing Hikari within inches of the front.  
  
A clammy feeling gripped her stomach and she ducked quickly under the barrier and ran for the washroom.  
  


~~~  


_I don't understand this...' _Hikari stared at her paper, the words blurring in front of her eyes. She knew that all around her, her classmates were having no trouble at all- some were probably even done already.  
  
  
_You're so stupid Hikari. I don't know why you even bother._ Those voices, cruel and mocking. Why wouldn't they go away? The words echoed in her mind and formed themselves on her lips, coming out haltingly.  
  
_Why... Why even bother?_ No, she wasn't brave enough. Unbidden, that girl, Mimi, sprang to her mind. She could call... Surely this was what she gave her the number for. _It probably isn't even the right number.'_  
  
Hikari thought about what her mother had said about the boy who had commited suicide in her hometown of Sano. Was it selfish, or was it the perfect means of escape? Selfish, yes... But what else could he do? _Why even bother?'_  
  
_Taichi, I need you!_ she whispered to the desk. Who else could she say it to? Her brother wasn't there.  
  
_You're pathetic Hikiar,_ the voices told her.  
  
The bell rang and Hikari put her name on her test and handed it in blank.  
  


~~~  


Hikari picked distractedly at her rice, not really eating, and not really trying to pretend either. The Yagami table was uncomfortably quiet, the gentle clink of chopsticks against bowls the only sound. Occasionally, one of her parents would try to start a conversation and Hikari would give a one word answer, not really thinking but still lost in her thoughts.  
  
_My family. My poor, broken family. I would bring more shame to them, but I would also relieve them of the burden of... The burden of me. But how would it feel to have lost both of your children?'_ She could feel her mother's eyes on her, trying to read her thoughts. Hikari's stomach lurched and she stood up quickly, her queasiness overpowering the head rush.  
  
_Look how twisted you are, Hikari. You don't even need us to torment you anymore._  
  


~~~  


Hikari tossed and turned in her bed, her sheets twisted around her. The minutes went by, the neon digits on her clock silently counting, and still Hikari dreamed.  
  
_Their dark shapes were clearer now, more human even, and their eerie red eyes glowed brighter. They were walking down a long passage way, and she was helplessly following.  
  
Whatever happened to sweet, helpful little Hikari? one of them asked condescendingly, and she couldn't help but wonder too. How _had _she become so hopelessly ensnared in this nightmare?_  
  


~~~  


Hikari sat quietly at a desk in the back row of her homeroom class. At the front of the room, her teacher called out names and the corrosponding students proceeded up to her desk to collect their report cards.  
  
...Melanie Green, Stacey Holmes, Mark Illoch... All normal, American names, belonging to normal, American teenagers. Hikari sighed, staring distractedly at her romanized name on the notebook in front of her. Even after living in America for two years, it still looked strange.  
  
...Julia Major, Adam Moncton, Roger Morris... Hikari leafed through her notebook, looking at her hesitant, messy script, and longing for the graceful _kanji_, for the familiar feel of reading right-to-left.  
  
The noise level in the room increased as more students recieved ther report cards and began to discuss their marks. The teacher's dull voice worked it's way down into the T's, and Hikari waited with a growing sense of foreboding.  
  
...Takeru Takaishi... Her attention was drawn to the eerily familiar ring of the name, admittedly backwards, and she watched as a tall blonde boy walked up to the teacher's desk. _I know him... But from where?'_  
  
Omigosh, he's such a hottie! A girl's voice brought Hikari out of her trance, and she wondered who they were talking about.  
  
Definitly! He's on my top ten list! Another girl added her opinion and Hikari felt the hope she didn't know she had fall in pieces. _They're talking about Takeru. I don't stand a chance to even talk to him.'_ Hikari's head rang so loudly from focusing on what they were saying that she almost missed her name being called.  
  
With a shudder of resignation, she began her death march up to the front, avoiding grabbing hands and various appendages stuck in her path to trip her.  
  
Hope you don't **fail**, _Hikari,_ came Gran't sneer from behind her, but she ignored him, finally stumbling up to the teacher and accepting the condemning piece of paper.  
  
The powerful waves of nausea caught her by surprise, so she had no time to steel herself for the impact. _Another failure, Hikari!_ one of the demons said, almost spitting her name. Hikari whispered something that sounded like an apology and fell to the ground unconcious.  
  
Just before she hit the floor, a pair of strong hands caught her.  
  


~~~  


Takeru carried Hikari's limp body through the corriders towards the nurse's office. She was surprisingly lightm and he could feel her bones digging into him. The florescent lights highlighted the hollows in her cheeks and the dark circles under her eyes, giving her skin an unearthly glow.  
  
Why is she so thin?' Takeru managed to open the door to the nurse's office without dropping Hikari and laid her on a cot. The nurse looked at him in mild shock, and gave a nod of thanks before he left.  
  


~~~  


_You are such a dissapointment to your parents Hikari. They hate you for being such a poor replacement for Taichi, your beloved _onii-san._ Hikari could feel the demon's clammy hand on her shoulder and she pushed it away weakly.  
  
I'd like to wake up now,' Hikari wished fervently, I'd like this to be over.'  
  
You should be punished... The demon's hand reached out to herm a pale wrist being exposed as the sleeve of its sweatshirt slid up its arm. Come here. If you don't struggle, it will be easier.  
  
Hikari leapt backwards, away from its cold embrace. No! This is all your fault anyways! You are the one who should be punished! The insult had no obvious affect on the demon as it cooly grabbed her wrists, pinning them behind her back. You're very thin Hikari. Thin and **weak**_****.  
  
_As Hikari struggled, the hood of the sweatshirt slipped back, revealing a little of her attacker's face. The lines of it seemed vaguely familiar, like they belonged to someone she hadn't seen in a long time...  
  
_Hikari lay on her back, staring at an unfamiliar ceiling. She could tell by the folding screen surrounding her cot that she was in the nurse's office, which was comfortng in an odd way. She had seen the ceiling of Odiaba Elementary School's nurse's office many times.  
  
Reality came flooding back very quickly once Hikari's mind had sorted itself out. _What will my parents say? I can't show them another report card like this...'_ She hadn't even looked at the paper. As much as she tried to busy herself with real world problems, one question returned over and over. _Why do I feel so betrayed?'  
  
_

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  


Neko: There! I finally managed to overcome my laziness and type this up!   
  
Enko-chan: ^watches TV and eats popcorn^ You're still lazy you know. ^yawns^ So tired...  
  
Neko: Stupid.   
  
Enko-chan: Are you going to bribe them with chocolate now?  
  
Neko: Shh! ^pauses^ ^angelic smile^ I'll give you chocolate if you review....


	3. And every day

Neko: Digimon is dead!

Lawyers: Yeah... Yeah, okay true.

Neko: And therefore, it belongs to me!

Lawyers: Yeah... Yeah, okay- Wait! No way! Digimon will never be yours!

Neko: Bah. --;

This is talking in English.  
This is thinking in English.  
_This is talking in Japanese.  
This is thinking in Japanese.  
This is dreaming._

Chapter Two  
------------------

_"I'm disappointed, Hikari," _Hikari's father paced in the front of the couch where Hikari sat, her thin shoulders slumped. _"I thought after our talk with your principal you might be inspired to do a little better. _ _I guess I was wrong."_

"I'm sorry, Father," Hikari said softly, _"But I am trying." _She stared at her knees, trying not to cry. _"I am trying so hard."_

"Oh really? Then why isn't it working?!" Her father exploded.

_"It's... It's just..." Hikari_ trailed off, barely holding back her tears.

Hikari's mother put her hand on her husband's shoulder. _"I think you've made your point, Nori," _she said firmly.

Hikari's father gave her one last hard look, then turned and walked out, leaving her sitting on the couch. He mother gave her a small smile then followed suit.

---

_"Why me?"_ Hikari wonder aloud. _"Why did all this misfortune have to pick me?" _She went and stood in front of the mirror in her small bedroom. She was unremarkable, only distinguishable from all the other brown-haired girls by her almost red-brown eyes, and now, by her gaunt appearance.

_"Why you, Hikari? Is that what you're asking?" _ She sat down quickly on the bed. _"Why not?" _ Hikari said nothing. _"Well, don't you have an answer for me?"_

"I've done nothing to deserve this..." Hikari said meekly. All around her, the room began to fill with shadows. _"I was a good child. I never caused trouble..."_

"Liar!" The harsh voice of a dark figure that had suddenly appeared at her shoulder slammed her into unconsciousness.

---

_She was floating above a playground in Odiaba. Below her, children played. Two of them stood out, making Hikari's heart sing out in recognition._

"You remember this then, Hikari." She turned and saw the same hooded figure as before standing beside her, although it seemed a lot less demonic than before. "I thought you might have blanked it out by now."

"What do you mean?" Hikari questioned the figure, noting that the formerly ominous hood was really just a black hooded sweatshirt.

"Just watch," it snapped, and Hikari, recognizing the tone of voice, obeyed.

"C'mon Hikari!" a brown-haired boy Kari knew was Taichi, called to his sister. "Come kick the soccer ball with me!" In what he thought was a glowing display of his soccer prowess, he dribbled the ball back and forth in front of Hikari.

The little girl's face was flushed and she looked feverish and tired, but she got to her feet. "Okay, onii-san." Taichi whooped with glee, and kicked the ball towards Hikari. She tapped weakly at it, and collapsed to the ground unconscious.

"You said you never caused trouble, Hikari," the figure spoke again. "What would you call that then? Having an ambulance come to take you to the hospital, just because you couldn't handle kicking a soccer ball? Is that not causing trouble?"

Hikari tore her eyes away from Taichi's face as he watched in shock as the paramedics took his sister away, the soccer ball at his feet. "That's not true! Taichi knew I was sick and he was supposed to be taking care of me!"

"Maybe so, but what about the time your family went on vacation, and you caught pneumonia and almost died? Or when you had to stay home from summer camp because you were sick?" Even though its shadowy face looked foreboding, the demon was starting to sound more like an embittered teenager.

Despite of this, Hikari was beginning to believe what it was saying.

---

"Mr. and Mrs. Yagami, we are here today, as I'm sure you know, to talk about the troubles your daughter Hikari has been having at school." The guidance counselor flicked through a pile of papers on his desk. "Has Hikari told you anything about these problems?"

Mr. Yagami opened his mouth to speak, but his wife rested a hand on his knee and fixed him with a brief meaningful look. "Not recently, Mr..." she glanced at the name placard on the desk, "Daley. To tell the truth, Hikari has not said much at all lately."

"Perhaps there are other things bothering her then?" questioned Mr. Daley.

Mrs. Yagami considered this briefly, her hand still on her husband's knee. "Well, she has been having a lot of nightmares recently, along with occasional spells of illness or fainting. I am surprised her school work has been affected so severely though."

Nodding, Mr. Daley withdrew a sheet of paper from his file. "According to comments made by Hikari's primary school teachers in Japan, Hikari was an exceptionally good student, and received top marks in all her classes. It also says that Hikari missed most of the last two months of grade six."

"Yes, indeed she did..." breathed Mrs. Yagami, her fingernails digging into her husband's leg.

Mr. Daley seemed not to hear what Mrs. Yagami had said, since he continued on, unfazed. "However, at the beginning of Hikari's first year of junior high school, the comments from her teachers change dramatically. Hikari is inattentive and distracted during class.' Hikari's assignments have been of poor quality.' If Hikari continues at this rate, she will have to repeat grade seven.' " He looked up at the two tight-lipped people sitting across from him. "Is there anything that could have caused this change?"

"There is, in fact... There-there was a..." Mrs. Yagami heaved a ragged sigh and stared tearily at her feet.

"A death in the family," Mr. Yagami said stiffly. "Our son, Hikari's older brother."

Mr. Daley dropped a handful of papers on his desk in shock. "Oh my goodness! I'm so sorry!" He took a deep breath, trying to regain his composure. "I-I didn't realize..."

"It's fine," Mr. Yagami said heavily, surreptitiously prying his wife's fingers off his leg. "Please continue."

"Yes, well." Mr. Daley still seemed a little shaken. He shuffled his notes nervously. "Hikari failed grade seven, and soon after that, you immigrated to the United States and settled here in Denver. Now, Hikari has been attending school here for more than two years, but her English skills have not improved to the degree we usually see from these students. Compared to her peers, Hikari seems to be putting in no effort at all."

Mr. Yagami frowned grimly.

---

Hikari sat in the kitchen, trying to force herself to eat an apple, a piece of toast, anything, but she couldn't do it. Today was the day that her parents had a meeting with Mr. Daley at her school. Her father would come home and berate her for not trying hard enough while her mother stood and wrung her hands in the background.

As she got up to clear her plate into the garbage, she caught a glimpse of her reflection in the toaster's shiny sides. The curves of the toaster distorted the image, making the hollows in her cheeks seem deeper, the dark circles under her eyes larger. She looked away.

"_Things have changed, Taichi,_"Hikari whispered. She looked back at the toaster, trying to recall what she looked like before that day at the park. She closed her eyes to stop the tears from coming, and when she reopened them there was someone else reflected in the toaster with her. Wearing a black hooded sweatshirt, the hood pulled over their face, they stood by Hikari's right shoulder. She turned around.

"Hikari." The demon nodded, and disappeared.

Just as it did, the door of the apartment flew open and Hikari's father stormed in. He was scarcely in the door before he started raging.

_"This is the last straw, Hikari!_" he yelled, tossing his briefcase onto the table and knocking Hikari's half-empty glass of water to the floor. She knelt to pick up the pieces but her father grabbed her chin and hauled her back up. "_Never before have I been so embarrassed! Never!_" 

Hikari stood frozen in terror. She was holding a piece of glass too tightly, and she could feel the blood starting to pool in her clenched fist. "_I'm sor-_" she started, but her father cut her off.

"_Can you imagine what it's like to hear some stranger listing off all your child's failures? Can you imagine what that's like?!" _His face was beginning to turn red, and flecks of spit flew from his mouth.

"_No, Father. I can't,_" Hikari whispered meekly.

"_Shut up! Just shut up! Mr. Daley," _he spat out the name, "_was right about you! You **are**__a failure! People say it's because you're delicate, but I know the truth! You're just stupid! And you know what?" _His voice dropped so it was barely above a whisper, and he grabbed Hikari's chin and pulled her face close to his. "_Every day I wake up and wonder why Taichi had to die instead of you." _Hikari fainted.

She awoke on the kitchen floor, staring up into the frightened eyes of her mother. "_Are you alright, baby? Are you hurt anywhere?_" Her father was standing with his back to them, toying with the half-empty glass of water sitting on the kitchen table.

Hikari struggled into a sitting position, fighting the urge to lie back down on the cool linoleum. She leaned back against the oven door. _"Yes, I think so." _Hikari reached up to touch the bruise growing on her forehead. Her hand felt wet, and she suddenly remembered why she was on the floor. She looked at her palms, but there was no cut, no blood, only a slick of sweat. _What is happening to me?_'

Her mother's voice interrupted Hikari's panicked thoughts. "_Do you need to lie down?" _She nodded, and her mother helped her to her feet and led her into her bedroom. Her father followed behind, clearly trying to decide whether he should say something. 

Before she pulled the covers over her head and drifted into an uneasy sleep, Hikari heard he mother whisper in an angry hiss. _"Not a word, Nori. Not a word."_

--------------------------------------------

Enko-chan: Don't try to pretend you're being productive. The last time you updated this was what, a year and a half ago?

Neko: Shhh... You're so cruel. I'm sure everyone is just glad I've updated. Right, everyone?

Everyone: Right.

Neko: And you're all going to review, right everyone?

Everyone: Right.

Neko: And you're all going to give me $1000 so I can buy a laptop, right everyone?

Everyone: No freaking way. 

Neko: So close...


End file.
